My favorite part of the holidays are the cards I give and receive. After black Friday I am going to go and get all the supplies and start printing and sending ours out. Martha Stewart has put together a few tips and tricks on addressing envelopes and how to do it formally and informally.
The Rules for Address Etiquette
Though etiquette for addressing and assembling invitations has relaxed, there are still some requirements, which we’ve outlined on the following slides (we’ve also included a few modern interpretations for more casual weddings). “The little things do matter,” says Dorothea Johnson, etiquette expert and founder and director of the Protocol School of Washington, in Yarmouth, Maine. “When a couple uses the appropriate honorific and writes out an address in the correct way, it shows they’ve put thought into it.” And when your guests receive your invitation, expertly assembled and addressed, there will be no doubt that you have done just that.
Names and Titles
Your guests’ names should be written in full on outer envelopes—no nicknames or initials. Use the appropriate social titles as well, such as addressing married couples as “Mr. and Mrs.” If a man’s name has a suffix, write “Mr. Joseph Morales, Jr.,” or “Mr. Joseph Morales IV”; “Junior” can be spelled out on a more formal invitation. It gets a little tricky when husband, wife, or both have different professional titles. If the husband is a doctor, for example, the titles will appear as “Doctor and Mrs.”; if the wife is a doctor, her full name would come first, as in “Doctor Sally Carter and Mr. John Carter.” If both are doctors, write “The Doctors Carter.” If they have different professional titles, list the wife first: “The Honorable Pamela Patel and Lieutenant Jonathan Patel, U.S. Navy.” If a wife has kept her maiden name, her name should appear first and be joined with her husband’s using “and.”
Addresses
Spell out all words in an address on your envelopes. Rather than “St.,” “P.O. Box,” and “Apt.,” use “Street,” “Post Office Box,” and “Apartment.” This applies to city and state names as well; instead of abbreviations, write “Saint Paul, Minnesota” and “Washington, District of Columbia.” House numbers smaller than 20 should also be spelled out.
Return Addresses
Write out all words here, too. The preferred place for printing the return address is on the envelope’s back flap. Traditional etiquette called for blind embossing, or colorless raised lettering, for wedding invitations; the idea behind this was that guests would get their first glimpse of the fancy engraving on the invitation itself. Blind embossing is still available, although the United States Postal Service discourages it, as it is difficult to read; today, most couples have the return address printed in the same method as their invitations.
Address Variations for Married Couples
Informal
To some couples, omitting wives’ first names feels too old-fashioned; including the first names of both husband and wife after their titles is appropriate. The house number, even though it is less than 20, can be written as a numeral for a less-formal feeling. And in keeping with a more personal style, the couple are addressed by their first names on the inner envelope.
Different Last Names
When a husband and wife have different last names, the wife’s name is traditionally written first. Connecting the couple’s names by the word “and” implies marriage. For an unmarried couple that lives together, names should be written on separate lines without the word “and.” On the inner envelope, both are addressed by their titles and respective last names.
Address Variations for Families
With Children, Formal
This outer envelope is identical to that of a couple without children — its writing, which is for the purposes of the post office, should be as simple and clear as possible. On the inner envelope, the name and title of each invited guest in the household is written out. A boy under the age of 13 is “Master,” not “Mr.” Girls and young women under age 18 are called “Miss.”
With Children, Informal
Parents’ first names are both used on this less traditional version of the outer envelope (“Post Office Box” is abbreviated as well). For the inner one, the parents’ and children’s first names are written without titles. Since they are young siblings, the word “and” (which implies marriage when used with adults’ names) linking the children’s names is acceptable.
Address Style for Single Guests
For a single woman, either “Ms.” or “Miss” is appropriate; many people find the former preferable. The guest’s name is the only one that appears on the outer envelope. On the inner envelope, however, write the guest’s name followed by “and Guest.” If you know whom he or she will be bringing, it’s more personal to include that person’s name, on a separate line.
Postage and Handling
Bring a completed invitation to the post office to have it weighed; many require postage for at least two ounces, which usually exceeds the cost of a first-class stamp. Have a reply card and its envelope weighed as well, to ensure that you don’t over- or underpay for that postage.
While at the post office ask what’s available for stamps, or browse through a wider variety at usps.com. You can also customize stamps through such sites aszazzle.com to go with the theme of your day or utilize a monogram you’ve chosen.
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